Less Reactions, Better Decisions

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Simple Formula for Responding Not Reacting

Whether it is unexpected traffic, a meeting that didn’t go to plan, missing an aid station in your marathon, a leak in your kitchen, a disagreement with your spouse or colleague, or something more significant, you can call on the 4 P’s to get you out of reacting and into responding:

1. Pause: Take a deep breath or two. Gather yourself.

2. Process: Label the emotions you are feeling. Tell yourself, This is what is happening right now, I’m doing the best that I can.

3. Plan: Now that you’ve collected yourself, make a plan for what you want to do going forward. Figure out what resources and skills you can bring to the situation at hand.

4. Proceed: Only then take action and proceed.

What seems to happen is that the more you practice responding instead of reacting not only do you start making better decisions but you also start to experience a part of yourself that is not so susceptible to change, at least not in the way you usually experience it. It’s the part of you that pauses, processes, plans, and proceeds. The part of you that is akin to the canvas upon which the content of your life is painted.

When you react to a situation you fuse with it and become it. Going from one reaction to the next is an emotional roller-coaster. When you respond to a situation, however, you put a few degrees of freedom between a deeper and more stable sense of self and the ever-changing current of your life.

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About: Reacting and responding represent two distinct approaches to situations, and understanding the difference between them can significantly alter the outcome. When we react, it is often in an instinctive manner, influenced by our immediate emotions, which can sometimes lead to impulsive actions. On the other hand, responding involves more thoughtful consideration before taking action, taking into account not only our own emotions but also the perspectives of others. The ability to consciously choose between reacting and responding can enhance the quality of our interactions, promote more effective communication, and contribute to more balanced and fulfilling relationships. Recognizing this distinction and developing the capacity to respond thoughtfully can positively influence our relationships and foster personal growth.

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TIP OF THE DAY

Giving away something you don’t use: Donate what you think you would not use instead of throwing them away. What might not be of our want might be someone else’s need.

THOUGHT OF THE DAY

Actions speak louder than words but consistency speaks louder than both. Choose people who always make you feel wanted.

MEME